Sketches about Christmas Dos

So there’s this event known as Company Christmas Do occurring annually in December. The jubilation of my participation in such events, I admit, makes me proud and slightly moved. The fact is, this December marks the 10th anniversary of this corporate phenomenon, encouraging me to briefly summarize the experience.

Let me start with some advice based on my acquired knowledge in the area that I am willing to share selflessly with the younger generations and/or with readers unfamiliar with corporate environment.

First and most important rule:

1. If you are in a good relationship DO NOT ALLOW your partner to go to a Christmas Do. This may cause a few grumpy days at home, but believe me, it will save your relationship. If you are in an bad relationship and your partner goes to the Do, breakup in January is guaranteed, divorce if applicable (it would be too cruel during Christmas).

2. Don’t be a naïve woman, however much your man may be in love with you, he will get tempted amongst the dressed and beautifully made up women, if only on an imaginative level.

3. If you are a man, acknowledge the fact that your partner will bath in admiring looks, compliments, and she will either (preferably, perhaps) dance with a different guy to each song, or (most unfortunately) enjoy all the songs with the same person.

4. Forget the free shots. Stick to wine and beer, supplied unlimited, so the final impact will be the same as that of shots.

5. You will not get full from dinner and you can never be fast enough to get there before all desserts are taken.

6. You will dance in the middle of a circle – most idiotic tradition.

7. The festive speech, although it might be short, is a perfect opportunity to size up your surroundings. ((Use it well.))

8. There will always be someone left out from the list of jubilees announced, don’t get offended.

9. The DJ does not work overtime, don’t waste your time asking for one more song in the early dawn hours.

10. You will definitely see at least one snuggling couple, try to identify at least one of the persons involved.

11. If you are looking for someone, go straight to the freezing cold designated smoking area, without a coat, they will be guaranteed to be there.

12. Prepare yourself mentally of the viewing of the party photos in a few weeks time.

Now, that the 12 rules are so readily available for everyone, it’s time reminisce about my Christmas Dos in these past 10 years.

I vividly remember all of them, although only 2 out of 10 were truly terrific and regarded since 2 of the best parties of my life.

The biggest one was the first, naturally at the first company I worked for. The whole company containing of 250 people then, journeyed to the Lake Tisza to participate various team building exercises in the afternoon and proceed to party till dawn. I am inclined to think that only a minor percentage of employees spent the night in rooms originally reserved for them. In average we were aged between 24 and 28, and even now, 10 years later we come across pictures or stories we can’t quite recall or on the contrary, ones we’d rather forget. Irony of faith I suppose, that many of the people from that overnight party are here with me now, at this new workplace 10 years later.

I spent 2 festive seasons at my first company, then, in 2009 I moved on and found myself in an entirely different Christmas Do culture. The second week of my probation landed me on an event held in the Museum of Fine Arts where, after a few hours I debuted on stage along with fellow newbies doing catwalks showing off the rucksacks that were given to all employees as Christmas presents from the company. The now 7 years old artifact accompanied me to Machu Pichu this year. Retrospective, I think it was a kind of an initiation ritual, and for sure, most of the people knew my name by the 3rd week of the probation period.

There have been a few loud parties here as well, but the best, also my second favourite on the list is the event in 2011. I loved the narrow, dark labyrinth of a place, where we all sang together and had to fight for a spot on the dance floor while having enormous fun with everyone. I like my current company very much but (although tested twice at different sites) it is yet to secure a top place on the ranking of Christmas Dos, however this might be more due to my being older rather than the fault of the organization.

10 years ago I was the young girl with the babyface, who would radiate the charming beauty of youth regardless of what she was wearing, but I have passed this privilege on to my 20 years old colleagues. Drinking wine makes me sleepy now, and my wardrobe is tempting me to wear dresses bought for previous occasions. 10 years and 11 dresses that have never been worn but for that very one night. It's time to improve the utility of such collection.

Hairdresser? Professional make-up? Entirely unnecessary, partially because they never turn out the way you want them, and also because your hair will curl up whilst dancing, and your make up will travel all over your face but of course, you only find out about that at the end of December or at the beginning of January when you browse through the long anticipated photos.

Lastly, and most importantly: what makes a truly good Christmas Do? I needed 10 years to be able to announce, further more, put it into writing that the only secret to a really good party is to have someone there you have a soft spot for, because of whom you look forward to the evening, and with whom the ongoing cat-mouse chase conducted makes the event all exciting. Since I promised myself a couple of years ago that I will not get involved with internal affairs, the Christmas Dos have lost some of their glamour and shine but let us not lose faith, there’s soon to be another party in 2017 and who knows, I might change my mind…..

Budapest, December 2017